Hidden Joy

About 2 weeks ago I realized that I needed to think of a present for a darling little girl turning 1. Like so many of us at the moment, money is a little tight, so I put on my thinking cap. What could I do that wasn't to cost an arm and leg but was still that little bit special?

Well, I searched high and low (thank you Google) and I thought, what if I was clever enough to make a soft toy for this adorable little girl? I carefully chose my pattern, printed it off, chose my fabrics and painstakingly cut out the pieces.

Then I pinned, sewed, looked at the tutorial, sewed, unpicked, sewed, pinned, scratched my head, threw my hands up, looked again, aha, repinned, sewed, stuffed, sewed, (repeat all of the above, and repeat again) and finally, I tied a ribbon.

Behold, my creation:

A suitably gorgeous softie for such an adorable little girl. Happy birthday Tiffany!

Fear made me ...

I have been reading a book called Fearless by Max Lucado. The basic premise is, if we were to get rid of all our fear what kind of life would we lead? This has been very thought provoking for me because over the last few years I have become quite a fearful person, here's just a few:

I am afraid of:
- the dark
- heights
- getting lost
- being seen as too talkative
- not friendly enough
- too opinionated
- not pretty enough
- not smart enough
- not nice enough
- of being a victim of crime
- of being in a car accident
- being in a plane crash
- losing a limb(s)
- becoming disfigured
- not being spiritual enough
- being too rigid in my beliefs and values
- being too loose in my beliefs and values
- not being a good enough wife
- not being a good enough mother
- people knowing that I don't cook every night of the week, or even every second night of the week
- losing control
- losing my temper
- not knowing what to do
- being seen as a child
- being seen as too serious
- not having enough fun
- being diagnosed with a terminal illness
- change
- things staying the same
- giving more than I may recieve
- letting go
- being too compliant
- tripping up or down stairs
- being left out
- being talked about behind my back
- saying the right thing
- being laughed at
- not being wanted
- being asked "so what do you do?" when my reply seems so insignificant "I'm a stay at home mum"
- getting the wrong haircut
- having hope that things can change
- being given up on by .... family, friends, etc
- getting hurt by putting myself out there to try and establish new or renew friendships
- emotionally /psychologically damaging my daughter
- Presley seriously hurting herself
- not being able to offer anything of value or worth to anyone
- BEING INVISIBLE

And trust me, these are only a few of the fears that ramble through my head. I know that some of you may read these and think 'how silly' but the reality is, we all have lists like these. Yours may not be as long, or even maybe as specific as mine but we all have fears. Sometimes our fear is simply a reminder that we are human and other times it can cripple us. Think of those who suffer from extreme fear, phobias such as spiders, snakes, heights, dying, flying, being outside, antique furniture, other people, needles, hospitals, etc, etc. The torment and the terror that their fear holds over them.

Our mind is our most powerful enemy and we must conquer it. When irrational fear strikes we must banish it, when real fear attacks we must balance it with what we know to be true: God will never forsake us. He is our rock and salvation, on Him we can depend. The Lord is our hope and our defender.

I have a long way to go before I can say that I am fearless but for now I will say this, I am slowly learning to put my fears aside and take hold of the life that God has given me, to become the woman He created me to be.

I'm working on it

Today has been one of those days. A day where you start out getting out of bed and feeling quite good. Although it is overcast and drizzly, you are still feeling good after breakfast and a shower so you decide to take your nearly 2yr old out to the shops because you need to look for a baby shower present for a friend. Now, the drive to the shop and the initial foray through the shopping centre are still allowing you to feel good. You're looking at your child and thinking 'You are just the cutest thing in the world', and then all hell breaks loose. She wants to keep trying on shoes, you want to walk away; she wants to get out of the pram but you want her to stay in it; you need her to sit in her car seat so you can do up the buckle, she decides that RIGHT NOW she needs to play with the interior light just above her door; you want to get in the car and drive home so you can relax with a cup of tea but you discover that your mobile phone is missing. OMG!!!!!!! The proverbial hits the fan and the monster within is unleashed. After searching through and emptying the entire contents of your handbag, the shopping bags and a most thorough search of the car you nearly see red. Steam is pouring out your ears, visions of traipsing back through the shops and retracing your steps nearly cripple you and the steering wheel has received undue abuse for this catastrophe.

You suddenly realize that the last time you saw your phone it was on the top of the pram, so you open the boot and whip open the canopy of the pram. There, in all it's metallic glory, is your phone. You quietly ease back into the car, start the engine, turn the on some easy listening music and just weep. You are weeping because you saw something in yourself that made you pale with fear, a darkness that you thought you had overcome, the pit opening up and the monster emerging. Not dead and buried as you thought, but merely dormant, waiting for that moment of weakness, to unleash blackness, to spew hot bitter words, to make you doubt everything you thought you knew about yourself, to get you believing its lies.

BUT I have this to say to my monster: I will not succumb, I will not bow down, I will not be cowed. It is you who will succumb, it is you who will bow down, and it is you who will be cowed.

In all these things, we are more than conquerors through him who loved us

Today is Saturday

I have to keep reminding myself what day of the week it is. They all seem to blur into one. Last saturday night I went to a girls' night out at a friends place and decided to stop at Woolies to pick up some delicious treats. I drove into the car park but they were shut (it was about 7:15pm). I could not for the life of me work out why they were shut. Wasn't until I was retelling the story that a friend of mine pointed out the fact that it was actually saturday and Woolies shuts at 4pm. I thought it was friday. Oh dear.

And now to my Top 5: Most loved Books (Fiction). These are the books that I go back to time and again and never get bored with them.

1) The Mark of the Lion Series
A very moving and enriching series written by Francine Rivers. It is set in Ancient Rome and is the story of a slave girl, Hadassah. Beautifully written, I cry every time I read these books.

2) The Foggiest
by David Belbin
I was given this book by my grade 5 teacher Mrs Van der Weyden. I have read this book over, and over, and over, and over ... In fact, I last read it only a couple of months ago. This is the blurb:
"As the Gunn family move into their new Derbeyshire home, a strange fog descends over the country. At first, Rachel and Matt Gunn are as baffled by the fog as everyone else. But when their father disappears from his job at the weather station, the two youngsters decide to investigate - and soon discover the sinister truth behind the fog ..."

It's amazing how a book I was given at the age of 10 can still entertain me at the age of 29.

3) Clive Cussler
Ok, ok, I know he is not a book but frankly, I have found it too difficult to decide which one of his I like the most so I have narrowed it down to 3: The Chase, The Wrecker and The Spy. Plus any of the Dirk Pitt novels. Great action, fabulous locations, dreamy men and some classic one liners.

4) Heidi
by Johanna Spyri
Written in 1880 it is the story of a little girl, Heidi, who, at the age of 5 is sent to live with her grandfather in the Swiss Alps. He is a recluse and a very grumpy old man who is at first very reluctant to look after Heidi but through Heidi's persistance, and being an inquisitive and loving 5yr old, he gradually softens and deals with some incidences from his past. A beautiful story about hope and love. If you haven't read it, you should definitely get your hands on a copy.

5) What Kay Did
by Susan Coolidge
This book was first published in 1872 (around the same time as Little Women). It is about Katy Carr, a tomboy who is constantly getting into mischief but really just wants to be beautiful and loved. When she has an accident and becomes an invalid, her illness and recovery teach her to be the person she always wanted to be.

There are two sequels, What Katy Did at School and What Katy Did Next.


Of course, I have many, many more books that I absolutely love and adore but then it would probably be my Top 500 Books. And frankly, I know that even for cyberspace, that list would be a little too much. But please, enjoy my list and hopefully you may be interested in reading one of the books from my list, for yourself.

Uh oh, life got in the way

I know, I know, I know. I have missed 3 days. Well, life got in the way. No excuse but it is the truth. No reason to beat myself up, let's just get to it.

Today's Top 5: Trashy TV shows that I secretly love to watch

1) The Hills
That one has really sucked me in. I actually quite enjoy watching their lives unfold, mainly because they don't really live in the 'normal' world. I can't stand Spencer, oh Heidi, whyever did you marry him? And Audrina, kick Justin to the curb. Ok, rant done.

2) Hellcats
Ok, I know it only premiered last week but I enjoyed it in that really trashy TV kind of way. Look forward to the next installment. Ashley Tisdale as a brunette? I think it really works for her.

3) Bold and the Beautiful
Alright, this is the least secretive one on my list but I am going to put it out there. Again, it just sucks you into the vortex and once in, it is very difficult to get out. i spend most of the time shaking my head at the ridiculousness (pretty sure that's not really a word) of the storylines but they do get you watching to see what will happen.

4) 60 Minute Makeover
I think the name says it all. Mostly I am aghast at dodgy workmanship and weird transformations but there are times when they do it well and get it right. Still, it is very much C grade TV

5) How Not to Decorate
If you haven't seen it, it is a makeover show in which 2 interior designers redecorate people's houses. They have 10 days and a budget of 15,000pounds to complete it. Let's just say most of the entertainment is the 2 decorators who just flounce around and spend far too much time arguing over patterns vs stripes or curtains vs blinds. But it is entertaining in a trashy kind of way.

Well, now I'm back on the wagon, I intend to stay there. Have fun thinking of your own list of Trashy TV that secretly you love to watch!

In a nutshell...

Thank goodness for phyiotherapists! Remember I said about having a crick in the neck? Turns out I have a small muscle tear in my neck. That explains the dull ache and associated queasy feeling. So, I am on strict orders to limit how much I lift and to make sure I balance out what I do carry. Hm, not that easy with a nearly 2yr old and all the paraphernalia that comes with that. But I will do my best. I am pleased because the physio's recommendation is for me to have a 30min massage every week for about 4mths, and often thereafter. Oh yeah. Pity the bank balance won't allow for it. Still, it gave me great satisfaction to deliver that piece of news to my husband.

Alright, on with the show. Today's Top 5:

Things to be thankful for

1) My health

2) My husband and daughter

3) My family

4) My friends

5) The country I live in

And those are my blessings, in a nutshell.

Note to Self

Ok Self, here's something you may want to remember for next time, if you have a crick in the neck don't do any heavy lifting apparently it only aggrevates it. Hm, who knew.

But onto to today's Top 5, and I think I'll do All Time Favourite Movies.

1)It's a Wonderful Life
I watch it every Christmas Eve, part of our family tradition. I cry every single time. I love the message and the way in which it is delivered. Beautiful.

2) Anne of Green Gables
'Look Marilla, puffed sleeves' 'I don't know what Matthew was thinking. You're going to have to turn sideways to fit through the door'. A true romance movie. Breathtaking scenery, gorgeous hunk and a storyline that truly appeals to the woman inside.

3) The Scarlett Pimpernel
Maybe not that well known to all but my sister and I LOVE this film. One school holidays we watched it at least once a day for two weeks. I don't know, there's something about swashbuckling, gorgeous, secretive billionaires. "They seek him, they seek him there, those Frenchies seek him everywhere. Is he in heaven or is he in (dramatic pause) hell? (all the ladies swoon) That damned, elusive, Pimpernel."

4) Schindler's List
Boy oh boy oh boy. Talk about an emotional reaction. I cry everytime. This movie provokes such a strong response in me. Such a heartrending telling of life for Jews during WWII. Joseph Fiennes does such a brilliant job as the camp Commandant because each time I watch it I just shake with rage at his callousness, and am bewildered by his total lack of compassion for other human beings.

5) Mulan
This movie really appeals to me. I love the songs, the characters and the message of the film. An all round lovely movie. And I tell you, if it's possible to have a crush on a cartoon character then Shang-Yu is it for me.

Enough of my favourites, what about yours? I think it's really interesting why people choose the films they do to be in their Top All Time Favourites list.

Hump Day

Ok, Day 2 of my challenge. And today's Top 5 theme is (drum roll please), Favourite Chocolatey Treats:

1) Arnott's Chocolate Monte's
I LOOOOOVVVVEEEE these. One is just never enough. They are rich enough to be delicious but not rich enough to stop at just one, or two, even three ... maybe I shouldn't admit how many I've eaten in a sitting! They are just delish

2) Gloria Jean's Creamy Hot Cocoa
Smooth, very smooth. Slides down just right. And here's a fun fact for you: everytime I hear Michael Buble I just get the urge to drink one of these. He is very smooth too. Mmmm....

3) Mum's Chocolate Self-Saucing Pudding
Every mouthful is a hug from Mum. Delicious and comforting. One of my all time favourite desserts. In fact, it was my dessert of choice for my 18th birthday dinner. My mouth is watering just thinking about it's gooey, chocolately deliciousness

4) Authentic Italian Chocolate Gelati
Got hooked when we were in Italy. A staple for morning tea and afternoon tea. Just the right thing to cool down on a hot Italian summer's day

5) Ginger Caramel Tarts
Oh boy, almost too moorish to describe. The tang of the ginger, the creamy caramel filling and delicious chocolate topping. I would have to say they're almost better than ...

well you fill in the rest!

Enjoy

My challenge ...

We all need a challenge, and here is mine: to list off my "Top 5" for the next 10 days. They may be serious, funny, challenging, nice or just plain boring but, they will be mine. So here goes.

My Top 5 most disliked household chores (in no particular order):

1. Cleaning the toilet
Need I explain? Ok, maybe I better. Cleaning the toilet was my job, every morning for about 5yrs when I lived at home, always a point of contention between me and my mum. Plus I used to have a very weak stomach, it is a little better now though.

2. Cleaning the bathroom
Too much hair, too much scum and just generally gross

3. Sweeping the floor (sorry Bron)
Only because I end up doing it about 3 or 4 times a day and it never feels any better

4. Washing
Always ongoing, but I guess the bonus is I don't have to do it by hand.

5. Ironing
I think that one's a given.

What are yours?

Life's Fragility

Today I got a massive reality check: life is fragile.

Why do we spend so much time chasing things that don't last, yet ignoring those that do? Why do we feel the need to fill our lives with 'entertainment' yet pooh-pooh the creation that God gave us? Why do we listen yet not hear?

Life is too fragile, it can snatched away at any moment. My challenge from today is, if this was my last hour am I ready?

Please wait, you are being redirected

As I was signing in to this blog a little window popped up telling me that it was redirecting me from the sign in site to my blog site. Redirecting? Hm.. this got me thinking about what has been happening in my life over the last few weeks (make that years).

For the last 2 years or so I have felt very much in limbo, feeling lost and confused about my place in the world. It has been a very hard, uphill battle to reach this place now where I am feeling somewhat secure and at peace. So what has happened to get me to this place? Well nothing of real significance except that I have begun the process of letting go of what and who I thought I was so that new possibilites and experiences are opened up to me.

The need for me to let go was really brought to my attention a few months ago but in typical Suzannah style, I ignored what God was showing me and tried desperately find the solution to my angst on my terms. How foolish I was. But through a number of external situations, and an almost countless number of internal confrontations, I have finally seen what God has been telling me all along ... You are mine, I love you and I will provide everything you need. I don't need to prove myself to God, He knew me before I was born. I don't need to prove myself to others because it is only God I need to worhsip. I simply need to lay it all at His feet and put my trust in Him.

So, I have now put the inner turmoil aside and am concentrating on living the life that God intended for me: rich, wonderful, adventurous and breathtaking.

A very pleasant surprise

Today I went to a friend's place for a linen party and afterwards, as we were enjoying sticky date baked cheesecake slice with butterscotch sauce (it was as delicious as it sounds) my friend jumped up and said 'I've got something for you'. I had no idea what she might have for me and so when she handed me this:



I was shocked and very surprised. So thank you Michelle. I will have great fun reading it as well as using it to indulge my family and friends.

Birthday project

This was my project for my nephew's 5th birthday (1st June). It is a book bag. Just the right size for all those precious books that he loves to bring home from the library. There is a funny back story to this comment, to be told another time, suffice to say he is now banned from his school library!!

At my sisters house, each of her kids has a colour assigned to them for towels, cups, plates, etc. Very "Yours, Mine & Ours".` I am of course referring to the original movie with Lucille Ball - now that's a comedy. Anyway, I wonder if you can guess which colour is Coby's?

I would like to thank my mum for her help in getting the bag done, and looking so well finished. I don't think my own efforts would have resulted in such a lovely finished product.

The rut of stuckiness ...

All I can say for now is that I am feeling washed out, braindead and incompetent. I hope things improve soon. Too much to do to be stuck in this rut.

New look

Yay! I finally got around to it ...

New curtains for Presley




New curtains for the study




New curtains for our room

Camping & Rejuvenation

Over the Labor Day weekend we went camping up at Noosa North Shore as part of MCC's annual family fishing and camping weekend. It is a wonderful opportunity to catch up with people outside of church and it just gets better with each passing year. This year there were about 90 of us. I love it because it is right on the beach and has great facilities. With us were our lovely friends Steve and Sara and their scrumptious little man, Graeme. It was so delightful to go to sleep to the sound of the crashing surf and to wake up to the sound of lorikeets and kookaburras. But the most magical sight were the kangaroos grazing in the early morning light.





One of the things I love about camping is that you are not a slave to the clock. You get up when you wake up, you eat when you're hungry, you play when you want, you read, you lounge around, you swim, you chat, and you go to bed just becuase you're tired. I love it. Time is what you make it. I wish every day could be that way, *sigh*. Oh well, back to reality. Clothes to wash and fold, dishes to do, child to feed and a sick husband to look after. Truly, I wouldn't want it any other way.

A little ray of sunshine

My precious daughter, Presley, lights up my life. She is so much fun and brings me so much joy. Being a mother is such a wonderful privilege. May I never lose sight of that.

Catching up with friends

Today I had the privilege of catching up with one of my dear friends, Rachel. We had a lovely lunch down at Suttons Beach, with chip and chicken sandwiches the order of the day (mmmm ... love Aussie Rooster). After lunch, Presley and Henry (Rachel's son) played in the sand, and Henry attempted his first sand castle. Although not terribly successful (Rachel was very quick to point out that understanding the engineering of sand castles was not her strong point), he has a fantastic time at the beach. Once Presley and Henry were quite finished with the sand, we went for a lovely stroll along the waterfront all the way over to Margate. On the way back we stopped at Zorba's and had gelati. Yummo.

It was so nice because neither of us had to rush off for any reason and we could just enjoy our time together. What makes this get together so special is that Rachel lives in England (she is an Aussie married to an Englishman) and so she only comes over every 2-3yrs. I met Rachel when I was teaching in England in 2004/2005. God obviously knew I needed a friend that not only was familiar with England but also understood being Australian, Rachel was that friend. What makes this an extra special provision is that I was so pleased to discover that although she grew up in Melbourne, her parents actually live at Arana Hills (about a 40mins drive from where we live) which means that her visits to Australia bring her right to my doorstep!

It was just what I needed after the happenings of the last few weeks. Thank you Lord for friends and family.

A delicious treat

A truly delicious and decadent treat, Red Velvet Cake. I first made this for my younger sister's birthday in January. I have made it a couple of times since and it has been a big hit. It is dead easy and I promise you will enjoy it.

Red Velvet Cake

1/2 cup unsalted butter
2 eggs
1tsp vanilla
2 1/2 cups flour
2Tsp cocoa
1 1/2 cups sugar
50g red food colouring (you can add as little or as much as you like, or not at all!)
1 tsp salt
1 cup buttermilk
1tsp baking soda sprinkled over 1Tsp vinegar

Cream Cheese frosting

8oz cream cheese - softened to room temperature
3cups icing sugar
1tsp pure vanilla extract

For the cake:
Cream butter and sugar. Add eggs and vanilla; beat well. Sift flour, slat and cocoa together. Add alternately with buttermilk. Beat after each addition until combined. Stir in baking soda nnd vinegar mixture, with red colouring. Pour into 2 x 20cm well greased and lined cake tins.

Bake 30mins in a moderate oven. Cool and frost with cream cheese frosting

For the cream cheese frosting:
Beat cream cheese and butter until light and fluffy (about 2mins). Add vanilla and icing sugar. Beat, on low, to combine. If too soft chill until slightly stiff (about 10mins).

Do a crumb layer (this is an initial layer to seal in any crumbs), fridge for about 15mins until set, then continue to frost the entire cake

Getting my domestic goddess on!!

Two activities of note today:

1. I made my first ever batch of fruit buns. This is something I have been wanting to do for a very long time, but I needed to get up the courage. Which I did, and I am very pleased with the result. They are a little heavy but it is my first time so I think I can be forgiven.

2. I am relearning to crochet. Again, this is something that I have been thinking of doing but just haven't got around to. Thank you Debbie for issuing the call out for willing participants for your secret project. It gave me the motivation to get going. So tonight I watched a couple of tutorials on YouTube, and wallah! My first crocheting effort in ... oh I don't know ... 12yrs. Not too shabby.



PS I did get my new running shoes. They are so cushy. Can't wait to get back into the training sessions. My shins are feeling a lot better but are still a bit tender.

Shin splints, and all that jazz

Ok, ok. I know I haven't been on for about 10days but quite honestly I didn't know what to say!

I haven't been doing any running sessions because after my last heroic effort I ended up with shin splints. Yay. Very fun. But they are on the mend. Still, that put quite a large fly in my ointment. Doesn't exactly help the whole get fit regime I had started. Hopefully I can pick up pretty much where I left off. Of course, now I've started to lose motivation and I have felt quite down about it all. But I know that I can start again once my shins have healed.

First thing on my To Do list this week is to buy new running shoes. I think that getting proper running shoes that are right for my running style (I think calling it a 'running' style might be an insult to true athletes). I'm quite excited about it. I haven't bought new shoes since Oct 2009, and even then they were $10 from Big W! So, off to the Athlete's Foot to get the new fandangled measuring thingy done and then I should be set. Sweet!

Sucess!

Yesterday I did my second Couch to 5km session. It was pretty hardcore but also, surprisingly, a little easier. In fact, I ran 7 out of the 8 runs (didn't run the 7th). I was really struggling in the last one but I pushed on and ... I did it! I surpassed my goal of running 6 in this one. The only thing that was a real bother this time was my shins. I suffer from shin splints and it took a lot of grunting to finish the last 60sec run. Once I was home I followed some advice given to me by a friend and iced my shins for about 20mins (you rub vigorously up and down with an ice pack). That really does the trick. Thanks for that Julie!

There is definitely something satisfying about setting a goal and then reaching it. Sunday will be my 3rd training session. I have decided that I WILL run the 8 set bursts. That really will be something to be proud of. Then it will be on to week two of the challenge.

On a lighter note, this afternoon we are heading off to a friends' 30th birthday party. We're going bowling and then having a BBQ at the Sandgate waterfront. I am really looking forward to it. This will be the first time in months that some of our friends have seen Presley. What a nice surprise they'll have now that she's walking and 'talking'. I will, of course, give a full update in my next posting. Until then, have a terrific weekend and remember, you can do anything you set your mind to!

My mission

I am a woman on a mission ... well at least that's what the song says.

A few days ago I was issued a challenge. I accepted, whilst trying to fight the panic that was rising in my body. The challenge? To run the Gold Coast 10km marathon. I can hear you all gasping because as you know, I am a little challenged myself when it comes to hardcore physical exercise. However, as I said, I did accept the challenge. So how do I begin to scale the mountain now in front of me? Well, I was given the name of a podcast "Couch to 5km" that if I follow right, in 10 weeks I should be able to run 5kms WITHOUT STOPPING! The way it works is that you train 3 days a week (so for eg mon wed fri, tues & thurs as your 'free' days, with sat & sun as your big break) for 9 weeks. The system is set to pumping music and you do a 5 min warm up walk, then do bursts of run, walk, run, walk etc until you have done 8 run bursts, then you finish with a 5min warm down walk. The whole thing is done is done for you (voiced over the music is someone who tells you when to start running and when to slow down to walk) all you have to do is follow the instructions.

I decided that wed (24th Feb) would be my first session. I set my alarm for 6:17am (if you're wondering about the odd time it's because I have this thing about setting it for a common time eg 6:15. I feel as though I get that extra couple of minutes sleep whilst still awake before 6:20am. Don't ask). Anyway, the alarm went off and I opened my eyes. My first thought was, 'no one would know that I didn't get up and do my run' but I forced myself to get out of bed. In this situation I usually find myself thinking like Trinity from the Matrix, when in the opening scene she flies Superman style through the window and lands on her back at the bottom of the stairs, whipping out her guns she says "Get up Trinity, get up" (conquering the fear and stuff like that). Anyway, I digress. So, I get my gear on and set out. I start with the warm up walk and then start my first 60sec run. I felt quite good. I slowed down for my 90sec break, and that's when the heavy breathing kicked in. Then I started my second 60sec run ... more heavy breathing. By the end of it I was wishing I had stayed in bed. The 3rd run burst I just walked, but I ran for the 4th & 5th, resting in the 6th, ran the 7th but was really unable to do the 8th. I was sweating like crazy, gulping down air and praying for it to end. But ... I did it. I ran for a total of 5mins! I have no idea what distance it was, but I felt good.

Tomorrow will be my second session. And I'm hoping that I can do 6 out of the 8 runs this time. When I do cross that finish line in July (the GC marathon) I know I will have accomplished something great. But first I have to get through tomorrow's session. Lord give me strength!!

It's a wonderful life

This is my gorgeous family. My husband, Rob, is a wonderful man whom I love very much. We have been married for nearly 6 yrs (April 10th 2004). My beautiful daughter, Presley, is 14mths old and a real joy. I can't imagine my life without her.

Today was wonderful, one of those days that makes you sigh and be glad that this is your life. It started with a lazy morning (as most of our mornings begin), Presley joining Rob and I on our bed with her milk. She loves playing on our bed and I am glad that she is able to do it every morning. After reluctantly getting up, Pres was fed breakfast, dressed and we headed out for a walk. It was so nice to out in the sunshine, and lovely to get out as a family. After getting home we slipped into our usual routine. This involves playing with Presley, changing her nappy, feeding her, playing with her, getting down on the rug to play Shape-O (currently her favourite activity), feeding, nappy change, bed.

There was nothing spectacular or unusual that happened today but I felt contented with my lot. And that is why I had a wonderful day.

It's raining, it's pouring!

I love the rain. I love it's smell and it's sound. I love the way seemingly mature and grown up people suddenly turn into little kids as they dash through it, giggling and laughing. How, although it is a darkened sky, you know that when the rain ends there will be glorious sunshine. The way the grass seems to grow right before your eyes and leaves glisten with drops. How you can hear the earth being nourished by the rain.

So although it has rained non stop all day, and there have been moments of panic as water sweeps in through windows or under doors, I feel as rejuvenated as if I myself where the one being fed today.

What is love?

"Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)" Chris Tomlin

Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now I'm found
Was blind, but now I see
'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
And grace my fears relieved
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed

My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy rains
Unending love, Amazing grace

The Lord has promised good to me
His word my hope secures
He will my shield and portion be
As long as life endures

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow
The sun forbear to shine
But God, Who called me here below
Will be forever mine
You are forever mine

BBQ lunch pirate style

It has been raining here since late last night. A very welcome relief from the oppressive humidity. This morning our little family ventured out to the Redcliffe waterfront. Although it was raining there were still plenty of people about. After a stroll and a milkshake we headed over to Burpengary for a BBQ lunch. It was to celebrate the 5th birthday of our friends' little boy. It was pirate themed, and although we didn't dress up others certainly got into the spirit. We had a really nice time, although we had to dash so Rob could get to work.

I always am amazed at our how uplifting it can be to visit with friends. And these friends in particular always lift our spirits. They are generous, kind and will do anything for us. Love you Suz and Shaun!

Not sure what tomorrow will bring, but I look forward to it with eager anticipation.

Saturday

What happened to make today so special? Well, nothing spectacular but the fact that I was at home with Pres. It's amazing how those couple of days away from her has made me appreciate the time I have with her. I didn't even get out of sorts changing her dirty nappies!

This morning Pres & I went to the grand opening of Beautiful You salon. A friend of mine has just opened up her own shop (having worked from home for a few years). It was great to see how excited she was. The week just gone was her opening week and she said it went really well, full appointments and plenty of walk ins. All I can say is, go Toni. What a fabulous opportunity and I know she'll do well.

It takes courage to step up and turn your dreams into reality.

www.beautifulu.com.au

Ch ch ch change ...

That last couple of days have been interesting for me, and our little family. Thursday saw me re-enter the workforce. Due to unplanned and unwanted circumstances, the very hard decision was made for me to go back to work. It was something I agonised over for many weeks, but in the end it was lesser of two evils that won me over. All I can say is: my MIL is wonderful, and I thank her very sincerely from the bottom of my heart for agreeing to look after Pres on Thursdays, and to my wonderful husband who approached his boss and has been able to get every friday off so he can take care of our little munchkin when I am at work. That is been a real relief as I was uncomfortable with the idea of putting Pres into daycare. So, what a wonderful provision for all of us. We all win.

Work turned out to be not as daunting as I thought. I imagined all sorts of scenarios, none very positive, but it turns out that I slotted right back in. Now I realize that I'm only doing casual work and on call work, but when you have been out of the game for 18mths or so it can be a very daunting prospect. My first two days went as well as I could have wanted.

When I took leave from work in 2008/2009, I was adament that I NEVER wanted to return to teaching, but when the going gets tough... I'm not sure that this is what I want to return to in a full-time or permanent way but it is fulfilling a need for the moment.

A big thanks to all those who sent words of encouragement on my first day. You may never realize what a boost that was to my spirit that day.

2010 ... A new beginning

A new year, a chance to change, a reminder that there is a fresh tomorrow. So, with all that in mind ... welcome to Snowdrops and Garlic. This is going to be my space, a time for me to reflect and allow you to follow my journey. I hope that my musings, ramblings and raves will bring a little bit of me into your life.